If you keep on asking “why” for long enough, eventually you will arrive at the conclusion that our existence is meaningless. Believe me when I say I’ve tried to find an alternate conclusion that is based on scientific facts, at least the ones known to us so far.
Once you’ve reached that point, you will realize it’s a dead end. So you figured it all out, or at least you think so. If nothing means anything, what is life supposed to be? I’ve been in this place a couple of times before, a dark hole indeed. But every time I managed to distract myself with a new obsession to not contemplate this further, to get out of that hole as soon as possible because the longer you stay in there, the harder it becomes to leave.
Eventually I had to face the abyss for long enough and decide whether I stay in this hole or whether I find a way out, not by distraction, but reasoning. If you cannot change something external, you can still change your perception of it, as the latter one is internal.
What if meaninglessness is not a bug, but a feature. Do we not enjoy virtual lives in video games precisely because of the fact that they are meaningless? What if nihilism is not a dark hole that sucks you in, but rather a very deep valley that you can cross to come out on the other side, where the gras is greener? Does meaninglessness not free us from all imposed obligations and expectations? Being alive in this very moment is incredibly unlikely considering all events that led up to this. Why not enjoy being alive free from any heaviness that comes with striving to achieve a false concept of “meaningful life”?
Just trying to be happy as much of the time as possible is what I shall strive for from now on. And while I do realise “seeking happiness” is not exactly groundbreaking news, happiness was always attached to meaning for me. One could only be happy, if one was living a meaningful life.
Realising you can still strive for the happiest experience possible with a complete lack of meaning while you are on this rock floating in space, was groundbreaking to me at least.
